Saturday, December 23, 2006

Immigration is what you have....

...when you collectively decide not to have children.
Reading Urban Onramps' posting about an Acton Policy article about Spain's Immigration problem.
Of course, part of me is thinking if you pair it with technology that replaces more jobs than it creates (software that can get rid of 20 secretaries but forces you to bring on 20 IT geeks and a manager, not helping) and reduction of wants and needs (you don't need a guy to blow leaves around at 7AM) may help.
But no. We want cheap labor and we ain't birthing that labor locally, so we import it.... or send the job off to a Chinese labor camp.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Still with the catholic thing

...and what of trans...transub sandwich a nation? Ya, know when the Roman priest says the magic words and the dry bread and the booze become the body parts of a 2,000 year old Palestinian? Catholic myasz.
Occasionally at GetReligion or is it CrunchyCon, it is stated that the Episcopal Church is what the media wishes the Roman Catholic Church was. yeah. Nah, I'd like the Roman Catholic Church to be more like the Eastern Orthodox, without all the friggin standing, the beards and the funny hats, and with good music. I'm quite sure there'd be other things I'd add or subtract. But then the RC wouldn't be the RC.
There are still some Protestant things I find hard to shake, like the meaning of Baptism. Immacculate Conception, uh, okay whatever. Pope? Let me get back to you on that. The problems that a lot of people have with the RC aren't always the same problems I have, so we aren't talking about my struggle but theirs.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Someone is having an identity crisis

A Newark Episcopal Church targeting disaffected Roman Catholics says that they aren't a Protestant demonimation.
Is all the British history I took wrong? Or is this one of those odd interpretations of catholicity and the Episcopal Church is Catholic the way I'm Native American? We do believe in "one holy catholic" (small c) "apostolic church" but if we say we aren't Protestants, than what are the Lutherans?

Friday, December 08, 2006

On church

Since Bc has told me when he is crossing the Bosporus (is that the name of the river) or in other words converting to Eastern Orthodoxy, I just haven't felt complelled to attend the Church of the Gay Lawyer. But since summer I haven't really been going on a regular basis. I don't think the tounge twisting liturgy (who wrote this stuff, lawyers?) and the incense are a big enough draw.
Of course, since the Adult forum classes, the double dipping and all attempts to get the good stuff from the farmers market in Dupont all come together, it is just a little out of my way to get down to tCotGL. Also the cold weather ain't helping either. Maybe a major factor is that I really like the Church of the Really, Really Blond People. The Adult Forum is great. The coffee hour rocks (yay deviled eggs). There are easy opportunities to pop in and out of charity work and minor thrills or joys that I come across. Even if I cross the Tiber, I may still want to attend tCotRRBP. That is unless Our Lady of Perpetual Suffering can beat tCotRRBP in adult education, entertainment, and munchies.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

I believe

To keep this from being a rant I'm going to stay positive.
I believe in a triune god. I believe in a loving and occasionally wrathful deity with a quirky sense of humor. I do not always appreciate G'd's jokes and sometimes I get pissed off with him in all three of his forms.
I live in a pluralistic society. I am aware of the other belief systems and it has taken a while for me to find, not so much a happy medium, but peace with those other systems and those who hold those systems. Peace as in keeping my mouth shut and doing what I feel the Lord has called me to do. Christianity is also pluralistic (maybe diverse is a better word) with various forms of Catholic (Roman, Eastern Orthodox) and Protestant (Anglicans to snake handlers) expressions. I'm aware of how I'm growing in Christ, and the options of furthering that growth.
Although I admire some Orthodox Christians, I really can't see myself growing in the Orthodox church. Too far, too inconvenient, and no seating. When I lived in Hyattsville it was a bitch to get to St. Andrews or St. Georges, so I didn't go. If I have to move heaven and earth to get there, I'm not going. If I find myself nodding off to sleep, I ain't going. My Christianity is 50% love of G'd and 50% being able to wake up, drag my ass out of the house, get to church on time and stay awake. Of course you could explain work the same way, 50% love of the work I do, 50% they pay me, I don't hate anyone there, and I don't fall asleep at my desk.
It's all good.
So part of my believing is based on my staying awake. Once I'm awake, there, and fairly in agreement, then I may give money. I might even volunteer. I might get involved. I might give a part of my life in time, talent and treasure. I don't give my life to just any belief system.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

And so it begins, again.

This evening I walked on over to Our Lady of Perpetual Suffering (not the real name, like the Church of the Really, Really Blond People) Catholic Church for the 5:45 Mass. Though the 5:45 mass was actually 5:30 and I got there just in time for the middle of the homily.
I haven't been in a Catholic Church since 1995. Maybe 1994. Massachusetts. That's when I chose the Episcopal Church over the Roman Catholic Church. Before I made my choice I was double dipping. I would go to both Catholic and Episcopal services, depending on my mood and who else was going. I went to St. Augustine's Catholic Church in Gainesville, across the street from the dorms and then later just a few blocks from my apartment. I would go with Steve&Donna (roommate and her boyfriend/fiance), hang out with Tourettes Mike (there were several Mikes in my life then), and try to get the Mass with Father Oliver (when Fr. Gillespie sang mass it always sounded like he was having personal problems). At Amherst I would attend with the Germans from the dorm. Achem occasionally played violin for the church and he was fun to attend with. But then I got Fr. Quigly, who when I encountered him was in an anti-cafeteria Catholics mood and very, very hard core. I was not ready for that. I needed something more palatable, and the Episcopal Church was palatable. Now, now, I think I am ready to try the hard solid stuff.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006


This weekend I hung out at the St. Gabriel's guest house run by the Little Sisters of the Poor (I would point to an out of date website, but why bother) in Catonsville, MD. It was a retreat that I was on the waiting list and then a few days before the retreat, I got a call saying I was in. So it didn't give me a lot of time to make arrangements, but I am thankful to Elizabeth and Bruce for getting me to and from the remote area.
I really didn't know what to expect from the retreat as I've never been on one. Never as a Baptist, and this is my 1st as an Anglican. My biggest fear was that it was a silent retreat meaning no talking and I didn't know how well I would handle that. It wasn't that bad. The only out of order words I said were "Huh?!" when I and Sister Catherine were trying to get my non-functioning radiator working. And on the last day I told myself to "Get up" and I uttered something else to myself that I have now forgotten. There was speech, but only in the prayers and we prayed 6 times+ a day with the nuns of the All Saints convent. When I got back to DC I found myself slightly missing some of the prayers, particularly compline. As one night we prayed something about dreams, and it all went well with preparing to go to sleep.
During the day I wandered the grounds. I mean a way to appreciate the little warmth of the room is to go out into the cold woods and return to something warmer. It was lovely out there. Peaceful, minus the planes from BWI. Saw some deer and some interesting birds.
So do I want to become a nun? Seriously, I don't hear G'd calling me to join a religious order. I can see what the attraction is, a loving community, the daily devotion to Our Lord, righteous work and a general well being.
Will I go again? Yes, but when the weather is better.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Where to worship tomorrow

It's another odd numbered Sunday. Screamy baby service or church of the gay lawyer? Or just for kicks random Roman Catholic Church. I'm thinking screamy babies. Mainly because Fr. Conner is doing the adult forum thing and I really don't feel like having to go from church to church, and there is a chance of rain. Also I got my main church to suck a huge amount of cash out of my checking account, whereas before I just wrote checks to whatever church my butt happened to have been in. I also made a huge monetary commitment for 2007, what the hell was I thinking?
Okay here's the plan... worship the Almighty while watching parents trying to bribe children into silence. Then listen to Fr. Conner. Then hit the farmer's market. Then bike by Immaculate Conception if it isn't raining to see when they normally have mass.
To make the step towards Catholicism work, I'm going to have to give up the Eucharist once a week or sneak it in during the week. However that doesn't seem possible as I haven't gotten into hanging out in the city after work down pat yet. Maybe when I cut out Wednesday dance night. Ugh, I don't like any of my options.

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Cultural context

My neighbor scored free tickets to an Indian dance performance over at the Lincoln, so I and his partner walked over to enjoy colorful costumes and dancing.
The first half was the local dance troupe just dancing. No story that was being told just dancing. I made up my own story, which was this was a girl gang of Indian dancers who were competing with the Irish step dancing gang. Then there was the out of town troupe, and it started off well then went downhill in a sari.
It began with a fellow on stage then down the aisle came the dancers with one fellow dressed as the Elephant god, whose name escapes me, on the shoulders of the male dancers. The story, yay elephant god! That I could figure out. The rest of it was three stories. One taking place in an ancient time, a story probably familiar to Indians or Hindus, but lost on me and my Jewish companions. The MC did sort of go over the story and it's history but I'm sorry, I had no friggin clue what the feck was going on. Something about a nasty rumor against the queen and her going through adversity. Yeah.... I'm sure if I was more familiar with the Sunday school version of the story I could better appreciate the alternative view and interpretation of the story, but no. While this was going on, on stage, the boys were nodding off. We escaped after the first story.
The other problem was the hand signals and gestures. This is also based in culture, which I couldn't interpret either. I could tell that the gestures meant something. Some were universal like sadness, crying, grief, NO!, and pregnancy. The rest, don't know and that was frustrating.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

October Grace

Dear Lord in Heaven
Thank you for the bounty of green tomatoes
that sit all over the house.
Thank you for the two tomatoes that did ripen.
I delight in joy,
receiving your gifts of one red and one green/yellow stripy tomato
Thank you for the sun and the rain and a good harvest of cilantro,
which with the tomatoes and a few things in the pantry allow me to
make tabbouleh.
The taste of it is out this world and the colorful sight
is a delight to the eyes.
Thank you,

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Walking in the garden

They heard the sound of the Lord G'd walking in the garden at the time of the evening breeze, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord G'd among the trees of the garden.
--Genesis 3:8

In today's adult class we had Dr. Kathleen H. Staudt, and because she is a new (to me) lecturer in the series I'm holding off any general impressions I have of her. I will say that she has the same bad habit I do of going off on a tangent, breaking up the rhythm and thought of something. I guess it will be after several lectures when I can start to trust this new lecturer. Anyway, her topic (I guess as I don't have the schedule in front of me) was the Laity or Verna Dozier Explains All.
Near the end she read one of her poems, and it had a lot of visual language in it so it was best appreciated with one staring off in the distance. It takes place the moment before Genesis 3:9 ("But the Lord G'd called to the man, and said to him, "Where are you?") when G'd is walking in the garden about to meet up with Adam & Eve. Dr. Staudt imagines in the poem G'd looking forward to seeing them and wondering when they will come to notice all the joys of creation like the sea crashing on the shore. It reminded me so much of the way parents talk about their really young children who see the world with the new eyes of discovery, making things pleasing to the Lord. As a parent maddeningly happy with some craft their 5 year old made. This image held until there was a part of creating more humans, the discovery of flesh on flesh, creating flesh. I guess this was the go forth and multiply part (Genesis 1:28). This was the human family part where there was mankind united by flesh making new and different humans that are united to their parents. There was the joy of G'd reflecting on knowing (like being really good friends with) all these new humans, and being in their hearts? Then the poem ends with "Oh my beloved ones, what is this that you have done."

Friday, October 20, 2006

Eye Candy

Recently a very handsome man has been sitting near my regular pew.
He could have been attending for months, years even and I would never have noticed him, if he sat on the other side of the church. Ewan McGreggor could have been attending my church but if he plopped his cute butt on the other side of the church, never would notice him. It's not a big church but my focus is very limited when mass is going on, if it isn't between where I'm sitting and the celebrant, I don't see it.
Anyway, when I do go (I alternate between the church of the gay lawyer and the church of the really really blond people) I look forward to seeing the back of handsome guy's head. It has been a thrill thus far.
No, I'll just keep it to admiring G'd's work in the male form from afar. One, I've done pretty. Pretty was tall, muscular and handsome and I wanted to kill him in his sleep. BL made a good point when she said you (the girl) have to be the pretty one in the relationship. Second, if the church had a beauty contest, I sure as heck wouldn't even place in the top 20. Maybe at the other church I'd be in the 17-19 range, in the summer when all the college kids are away. In other words, based on appearances he's out of my league. Besides, I tend to favor the geekier guys, they are cute, in their own weird geeky way.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

From this week's reading

Mark 10:17-23
As he was setting out on a journey, a man ran up and knelt before him, and asked him, ‘Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?’ Jesus said to him, ‘Why do you call me good? No one is good but God alone. You know the commandments: “You shall not murder; You shall not commit adultery; You shall not steal; You shall not bear false witness; You shall not defraud; Honour your father and mother.” ’ He said to him, ‘Teacher, I have kept all these since my youth.’ Jesus, looking at him, loved him and said, ‘You lack one thing; go, sell what you own, and give the money* to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me.’ When he heard this, he was shocked and went away grieving, for he had many possessions.

...and no one to help him pack it all.

If I ran into our Lord the Christ and he said Mari sell everything you own and follow me. Sadly I'd probably grieve too because I've been trying to pack all the crap I have in the basement to give to charity, but it just ain't happening. I have a small corner devoted to stuff that needs to go to Goodwill or the Salvation Army. There is more stuff in the house that I plan to give away later but it's so friggin heavy and unweildy.
Where did all this come from? Okay 1/2 from IKEA. When I left my parents' house I had 1 suitcase. When I moved out of my apartment at UF it took 2 trips in the Volvo station wagon to move it all. When I moved from the Logan Circle apartment, that was about several trips in a pickup truck to go 1/2 a mile. About 1/2 of what I own, I don't need, so why do I have it? How do I get rid of it?

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Worst sermon evah!

Enough time has passed that I can post this, because I can't tell you what day this happened, but I do remember who gave the sermon and thus which church, so I'm not saying which church (and I attend 2) so that it could have been anyone.....

One Sunday one of the seminarians gave the worst sermon I have ever heard. The topic? No clue. The sermon had no direction and no point, it was the essence of the word 'uninspiring'. It was so bad that my first thought was, "is it wrong to heckle the seminarian?" I wanted to yell "YOU SUCK!" Yet, it would have been un-Episcopalian, and un-Christian. I pondered throwing some of the fruit I bought at the farmer's market at the seminarian. But I throw like a girl and more than likely would have hit the old woman in the 2nd row. It was bad.
I wasn't the only one who thought so. I noticed that some people decided to ignore the whole thing and have whispered conversations during the homily.
Praise the Lord that homilies tend to be short.
I think I have been spoiled with good homilies. I listen to Episcopalian (St. George's in Leeds, UK), Lutheran (Bethel Lutheran in Cupertino, CA) and Catholic (BustedHalocast, & Technopriest) homilies in podcasts and they are inspiring and good. It is just when encountering one so bad, I just had a violent reaction to it.

Saturday, October 14, 2006


Dear Lord in Heaven, save me from my own bad habits. AMEN.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Stupid theological quiz

You scored as Augustine. You have a big view of God and also take human sin and depravity very seriously. Predestination is important for you.



John Calvin




Karl Barth




Charles Finney


Martin Luther


Friedrich Schleiermacher


Jonathan Edwards


Paul Tillich


Which theologian are you?
created with

Friday, September 08, 2006

Liturgical Dance

Oh I do want to make fun of it, but why bother when a girl's school play does such a good job at it (you tube).
A while ago I got a double dose of liturgical dance at a family reunion. I'm related only by my grandfather, who was the cousin of the grandmother of the family. Anywho, the first gal who did the dance I realized had also danced at my cousin's rehersal dinner. I don't know if I can expect more of the same at another cousin's upcoming wedding. It wasn't bad, however liturgical and dance just don't seem to gel right in my mind. The second lit dancer was more of the same but without the "proper" lit dance clothing. I see now there are certain stock movements. There is the pushing away move. A lot of that. Long strides, hands to heaven, maybe a twirl.
I still prefer Steven Colbert's lit dance.

Sunday, August 27, 2006

Mish mash posting

1. Bought a 10 year port. Dang those bottles are expensive. A twenty year port was like $50-$60! Also bought some Irish cream. I am slowly stocking my future liquor cabinet.

2. I'm getting fat. It's my own darned fault. I did not help things by going to Cake Love and buying 3 cupcakes. Alcohol has plenty of empty calories.

3. Went to the screamy-baby service. At some point I will replace the screamy baby service and the St. Paul's service with a local Roman Catholic church. I do not look forward to returning to the days when I interchanged RC and EC services. It was one thing back then but now I so dislike missing the Eucharist. But if I find someone like Fr. Oliver in the RC (minus the girlfriends on the side, the man had a Clintonian definition of celibacy) I'm so there.

4. I'll try selling my bed again. Short of that I'm calling Goodwill and having them take my bed, the dresser, the table in the basement, and a bunch of clothes that don't fit because I'm so fat. I've tried FreeCycle. FreeCycle ruined my birthday because some African idiot wanted to waste my time and failed to pick up a computer.

5. Oh, I'm older now. That damned biological clock is going off and driving me crazy. No. I don't believe my life is better without children. Yes, it is less hectic and I have money and can do whatever when I want. But part of me feels that this body is not doing what it was intended to do, which is provide life. The baby explosion in this neighborhood isn't helping. I'm happy for all the mothers and some have given me some hope who are in my similar age range, but I don't see a future father (all the guys I know are unwilling, or unsuitable) near the horizon.

6. My cousin is getting married. Because he's having it on the beach, it is messing up my budget. I've bought the $19.99 gift, made reservations at the hotel (picking the $63 a night one over the $100 a night one two blocks up), and now have to figure out at what level of pissed off I want to make the family by not wanting to show up at the bride's pre-wedding shin-dig. I love my cousin (the groom), with the same level of love I have for other cousins, and I'm more than willing to give up my spot. And since there is a ton of groom side drama, I AM MORE THAN WILLING NOT TO SHOW. Also it does not help that I am on a budget. I have tossed the credit card out of my wallet and when I do find it, I'll probably cut the thing up. I need to call the other card companies and close those cards. But back to Russell, I hope it is a lovely event, and I hope that I can wiggle my way out of it. This is the 3rd wedding (Kim, sis, now Russ) of the family and they are getting expensive.

7. I need to get off the computer and start reading dead trees more.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Have Humanists ever worked the Express Lane?

I listen to the Veritas Lectures occasionally and they do have the odd Humanist/ Atheist do counter the featured Christian apologist. I'm guessing there are better Humanists out there. The failure of Humanism is supposedly that it does not answer the Holocaust (what does?), my problem, from what I've heard, it fails to answer the Express Lane at winy-Dixie.
The Express Lane is the place where I cried on the job after being screamed at by a WIC mother who couldn't get what she wanted. People are sonsofabytches. It is very hard to appreciate my fellow human being when they are trying to con you, are being super winy or have 100 tiny cans of cat food and 50 coupons. Hey, isn't this an express 10 items or less lane? In the Ivory tower people are easy to value based on their being human. It is nearly impossible when they are right there and if you had the power to make them disappear, you would. Thank goodness for the love of G'd. Accountability to him, his forgiveness and love egg me on love my enemy. Which also is a pain in the butt. Problem with Christianity is that you can wind up bearing a cross.

Monday, August 21, 2006

The vintage of Our Lord

Call me tacky but the sacramental wine was quite good this Sunday. Bold, with a heavy body. I would like more, well without the burden of it being the blood of my most precious Savior and Lord Jesus the Christ. I wonder what wine the church uses. It tastes like port, it has that sweetness.
I need to improve my port wine reserves which right now is limited to the cooking wine quality of port but not good enough to be a satisfying drinking port. I need to raid a good wine shop and find all qualities of port, cheap to the $40 stuff. Maybe I'll do that after I pick up the drycleaning today.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Modesty offends Washington Post Fashion Reporter

I was annoyed with the Style writer's Robin Givan'sarticle in the Post today. The article about swimwear for women who would prefer to cover up and apparently that can't be tolerated. To be fair to Ms. Givhan she does mention that the makers of WholesomeWear aren't forcing their suits on anyone. But she does go on about women's body image (um no thanks to the fashion industry and their anorexic models) and how women need to get over it.
I feel she was picking on WholesomeWear, which I admit isn't the most appealing of the modest wear suppliers. There are several Islamic athletic and swimwear suppliers (I have yet to find orthodox Jewish swimwear providers) whose clothes make a strong effort to be 'pretty'. WholesomeWear suffers from the Western Christian problem of being kinda ugly. When I am looking for modest and pretty, I gotta go with the Jews and the Muslims. Maybe in years to come Western Christian modest clothing providers can catch up and make more of an effort not to look horrid.
Update: Okay what annoyed me was the writer finding a bit of offense that there is a market out there for woman who want to cover up. A second reading, I noticed that she stated there is the option of the one-piece and wrap skirt for those who want to cover up. However, despite that option, some women chose to opt to cover up even more and it seems that Ms. Givhan doesn't comprehend it. How is it liberating if you don't have the choice to decide what you want to wear because someone else wouldn't want to wear it (you don't have to). You want to freak out people in the West, be it America or UK or France, wear a head covering. Well maybe not France, they might riot and write laws prohibiting you from wearing it.
I was once stepping on a bus and was annoyed by the Metro driver who commented (I guess trying to be flirty and light) asking why was I hiding my legs. I tend to wear long skirts and it was none of his business. I like long skirts, particularly flared ones as they are dramatic when dancing and some dance around my ankles when descending the stairs. But you know, they are my legs and I'll hide them if I want to. Hiding them gives me a certain freedom. I discovered with long skirts, I don't have to sit with my knees together. They can be a good foot apart and I'm still modest. I am free from regular shaving. Yes, I could be one of those women who go about with hair legs and armpits for the world to see, but I'd prefer not. Long skirts allow me to let the leg hair grow as there is no leg to see stubble on. Ditto for the sleeved shirts.
Anyway, back to Ms. Givhan. If she truly wanted to liberate women how about more articles on clothes that make the regular woman, with the spare tire and the short legs, and the cottage cheese thighs look beautiful, confident and smart. Truly beautiful, not that patronizing feel good stuff about a two piece "underscoring her [the older woman] strength." 'Cause if it did, why don't I see that on a runway? We are not all supermodels and clothes that look great on a highly paid toothpick are an eyesore on your average American woman.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Made me laugh

I was looking at a blog called Urban Onramps and saw the title: "God loves you and has a difficult plan for your life" and laughed.
Looks like someone took my idea of the never written book I will write in my dreams, "Jesus was not a nice man who went around doing nice things." Yes, completely stolen from the sayings of Fr. Ron Connor.

Monday, June 26, 2006

Diversity in TEC

With all the proclaimations about the Episcopal Church (TEC) being open and inclusive it has occurred to me that TEC is mainly white and upper class. Yes, I know you ar esaying sarcastically, 'you're just now noticing this?'. No. Sorta. Well you know there is stuff you know but the info is treated like noise? That's like this.
Anyway I'm now reflecting on the lack of economic diversity in the Episcopal Church. I would say educational diversity as well. In the US. That diversity is found in the Anglican Community, which does not explain why even Anglican pronouncements require a graduate degree to understand. Within the Communion I am united to the poor in Africa. The loss of the Communion would disconnect us.
All for the better in time. I think I would like to read a history of the Universalist Unitarians, whose path I think TEC is now taking. I was aware of this trend in the TEC but figure as long as we continue to keep Christ central we were fine. But with the GenCon06 over and TEC failure to confirm what Jesus, Our Lord and Saviour, said about he, Jesus, being the only way to the Father, then I don't know what to say. I was aware of people who will say the Nicene Creed but really do not believe in the Church, but I figured them to be a minority. I see that I was wrong unless anyone else has a decent explaination why it would kill the TEC to proclaim that Jesus is Lord.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Ten pluses ten minuses

because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I am about to vomit thee out of my mouth
--Revelations 3:16
I prefer the more updated version, and I can't find my modern english Bible right now, but I think it goes, 'You are neither hot not cold so I'm gonna spit you outta my mouth.' or something like that.
That's been my theme. That has been my problem. I am lukewarm. G-d's gonna spit me out. I've been comfy in the Anglican Church because it was lukewarm not Baptist hot or agnostic/ humanist cold, just right. However the waters is gettin a bit chilly. Sorta warm, with an ever increasing cool comeing on. Of course, that could be my perception through the lens of the orthodox. I said my move, if I move, or swim the Tiber, will be in 1 to 2 years. I will spend that time in prayer. Someone noted that one shouldn't swim to one side of the river just because things on your side, is looking bad. No. I really need to give it some thought.
Another thing, I am lukewarm because I am constantly trying to balance various beliefs about Democracy, faith, fairness, and life in a pluralistic society. I know that in the end when things battle out, G-d wins. Because of all those things, it is faith that is the only thing I will submit to. I want to be a good citizen. I want to be fair. I want to make the best of a diverse city and nation. I must be the best Christian I can be.
Anyway, so crossing the Tiber. There are reasons not to. 10)It is a controversal church. 9) Pope, I like him but the idea of one man with all that power... 8)Past sins of the Holy Roman Catholic Church, when it was less than the bride of Christ. 7)It's so unyielding. 6) Confession. 5) Bad & boring homilies. 4)People and Priests, who believe priests are all that and a bag o' chips. 3) Bad priests, who don't think and those who hurt people and destroy the faith. 2) No Fr. Connor. 1)I was confirmed in the EUSA 4 years ago, crossing now seems wrong.
Ten reasons to cross:
10. Hot Catholic men
9. Church excommunicates Spong-like nuts
8. Fr. Roderick, and all the other Catholic media folks who draw me to the RCC.
7. St. Paul's and mid to high church services have already prepped me for RC mass.
6. Worldwide communion.
5. "Upon this rock...."
4. Greater tolerance for Catholic liberalism than Episcopalian liberalism.
3. Consistancy on certain issues.
2. Smells & bells and lots of latin (depending on church)
1. If and when I have kids I might get a discount at the parocial school.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

I don't wanna leave

Woman bishop. A movement away from Biblical teachings. But the last straw, the last straw was rejecting the World Wide Anglican Communion. The General Convention of 2006 is depressing. The Episcopal Church will remain but without me. I will make my exit over a year or two. It is a two year plan. There is too much of my personality locked into this damned denomination for me to just jump ship as quickly as I would like.
I really like Christ Church. I can say (well to myself 'cause no one else gives a rat's ass) that I attend the same church as Donald Rumsfeld (though I have only seen him once) and Ward 2 Councilman Jack Evans (or a guy who really, really, really looks like him). There are people in the church who I have bonded with. It was hard enough to leave St. Georges, but to leave the whole Episcopal Church breaks my heart just thinking of it. It has been 4 years, just 4 years since being confirmed in the Church with my family and friends laying their hands on me, after flirting with it for about a decade going between Catholic and Anglican churches.
As much as I like the Lutherans.... no. The key is the world wideness. I liked the Episcopal Church for the liturgy and the fact that I was united with Christians following the same ritual in Africa and Latin America and Asia. It was not just the West. It was the East and the South. Now, it is just the West again. Just another mainline American Protestant Church going the way of the Unitarians. The only other church that, despite its zillions of faults that holds scriptual authority for me is, *sigh* the Roman Catholics.
Bah. I need to pray more.

Monday, June 19, 2006

I'm counting this as feeding the homeless

I have 3 homeless kittens stinking up my living room. I have been feeding them for 4 days now and I would like for them to go to good homes, otherwise known as AWAY. I was planning to sign up for feeding the homeless with Salvation Army when it dawned on me that the kittens are homeless and G-d's stinking hissy creatures. I'll be happy when they are away and I can deal with not so hissy creatures.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Faith Based Libertarianism

Is there such an animal?
Well the actual thing that was roaming through my head was the right of like minded people to come together and practice their faith as they choose, and the right of the individual to associate and disassociate with that group. Then what rights does the state have to regulate the actions of groupings, or corporate bodies.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

No sympathy here either

You know what annoys me today? Yes, just today. Young 'uns who believe they are too poor to save or donate to charity, yet will find the cash to have a regular cup of gad-awfully expensive trendy coffee.
You are never too poor for a savings account. SECU of Maryland will let you have $10 (maybe they've upped it but last I checked, $10) in a savings account. How friggin hard is it to come up with 10 bucks? And, then, not take out the 10 bucks? And, maybe add a few bucks to that 10 bucks? Of course, you need to have it with a place that won't charge monthly fees.
If your employer offers a 401K or its equivalent, take it. I swear if I hear someone whine that they can't donate the minimum of (for me it was $20 at AAO and $15 per pay period with the Govt) I'm gonna hit 'em with a newspaper. One day, they are going to get old or reach their late forties and wonder how they are going to retire. I plan to work until I'm dead or too crippled to work. However I'll need money to pay for rent (or mortgage), food and healthcare. The retirement fund is for the health care.
Lastly, you are never too poor to give to charity and make a habit of it. When I was a kid I engaged in the strange practice where my mom, or other older relative would give me a dollar in church and when the plate came around I put the dollar in. Most of the time the dollar wasn't mine but it allowed for the practice and understanding that I'm supposed to give to charity. And as a regular thing. So now I still give. Much more and the goal this year is to give a percentage of my gross income to charity. But even as a poor college kid, I gave to charity.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

The most unsympathetic tale for Plan B

In Sunday's Post there was an opinion piece about Plan B from the point of view of a 42 year old woman whose birth control failed and couldn't get the Plan B pill. I found it very unsympathetic. Mainly because I'm wondering, why didn't she just get her tubes tied after her last pregnancy? My mom got her tubes tied after my sister and my sister after her third kid got her tubes tied. I figure if you are of a certain age and you pretty much believe you don't want any more kids.... um, tube tying should follow. I would feel different if the woman was 35 and thinking maybe she'd have a 3rd child in the future but not right now. But she seems to not be open to having more children, so then, why set your self up for the drama? Not taking a route that requires less maintenance (pill daily) seems irresponsible, particularly when there are non medical options such as IUDs and tubal ligation.
Gad, I dislike unneeded drama, particularly pharmaceutical drama.

Friday, May 19, 2006

Grace Cathedral

I don't know what to make of them now. They are somewhat back in my good graces. I got pissed with Grace Cathedral (the representatives of liberal episcopal theology that hasn't gone off the deep end) when I read a report of a female priest painting Our Lord and Savior as a xenophobe and a podcast where I swear the priests were confirming the author's premise that no Jesus wasn't devine. They got a little love in my heart when they interviewed Anne Rice and some other person (Bishop somebody). Ms. Rice has converted to Christianity. Welcome Anne. And the speakers and the moderator priest was now reconfirming the devinity of Christ and the historical Jesus.
I'm begining to wonder if the priest who moderates these things just agrees with whomever is speaking.M: Jesus was a big jelly donut? Well I quite agree with that statement. I find that after I take the eucarist, with the wine and all, I'm thinking... jelly donut.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

S**t like that makes me want to be Catholic

I was reading Get Relgion's blog post about Grace Cathedral in San Fran where the celebrant showed that "Jesus was xenophobic, racist and sexist." Excuse me? People may say that the break up of the Episcopal church was due to same sex marriage and gay bishops. No. Those were the straws breaking the camel's back. It is crap that denies the divinity of Christ, is anti-Jesus, and tosses the Bible and 2000 years of theology out for whatever, that makes me want to leave.
I was dancing with Al the other night and he was telling me about his new church in Laurel. He used to live in College Park and I asked or mentioned about St. Andrew's. He sighed and said they read Beckett, and he wanted to know what did Iasiah say! The bible being thrown out for less divine reading. Crap theology. Ya, know there is a perfectly good Unitarian chuch, with very nice people in College Park. I mean if you are not going to use the bible as your main reading source, and source of inspiration, may as well go for the real thing and be something other than Episcopalian.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Much Better Now

Ok. I am much better now. I know this because la bicicleta el crapo broke and it is ok. A few days before and I would have been weeping. When it was obvious that I could not ride the darned thing to the Garden District and nothing I could do to fix it with dirty greased hands and a key, I just walked it home.
I have yet to finish the application for the NARA job. I will be done, waiting for the UF transcript. I only have page 2 of it. Page 1 has gone missing. Considering the short time I have this is stressful. Well thank goodness I am covered in the grad school area.

Thursday, April 27, 2006


ok. I should be in bed.
But I'm having one of those rare depressed periods. I know it will pass but I can't rationalize it away, like I normally do. The problem is that the depression teamed up with anixiety. bastard.
I'm haunted by the phrase "For where your heart is, there your treasure will be also." There is something to that and it deeply saddens me. deeply. I won't go into it here. I just need to record it. so when this wave passes over me, I can remember.
Also my friends are a bitch to find. When I realized what was happening, I called up E, M, and J. Nearly C but he wallows in depression and figured that would be a bad move. Either no one answered their phone or they couldn't talk. I did reach B but our friendship is not strong enough ( I think) for me to lean on him. He was helpful. He did solve one problem. Couldn't call S because she has a ship load of problems worse than mine.
Pray for me.

I'm not getting up for anything less than the risen Lord

To be fair I do listen to the more liberal end of the Episcopal church on my MP3 player among the more tranditionalist Catholic, Lutheran, Anglican and Non-Denom podcasts. But that is just one podcast, from Grace Cathedral in San Fran. Well anyway, I'm listening to one of their speakers and the priest and I'm just annoyed. Partially because they are Episcopalians. If they weren't I'd just happily ignore them. Second, they were dismissing subtlety the divinity of Christ, the virginity of Mary, and just being all gnostic.
It is a free country and they can think whatever they want, I don't have to agree with it. The problem is when those elements are in the same demonination as I, by remaining in the domination I am in a way accepting the apostasy. I don't.
Because really, there are better things I could do on a Sunday morning. Sleeping more is one of those things. Really, if I was going for a more comfortable theology I would be attending the Church of St. Mattress under the Holy Comforter every week. St. Mattress is a warm inviting church where Stained Glass Bluegrass plays (until I hit 'snooze'). I need the sacrament of the body and blood so even Bedside Baptist isn't my thing.
I don't go to church to hang out with nice people. There are some perfectly fine people in my neighborhood. All we need to do is have a "happy hour" and we're good.
No, it is the risen Lord. The Son of G-d that urges me, compells me out of bed. It is the Lamb of G-d who takes (taketh) away my sins and brings me closer to the Father that makes me want to bike up a hill, in a skirt to church. Nice Jewish philosophers, I don't need a church community or a priest for that. The Church of the Holy Comforter can accommodate books from Half and podcasts and don't require such effort.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Rethinking Easter

I've done it so long that it has become Tradition, note big T. I don't go to church Christmas or Easter. I leave it for the folks who never bother showing up for the other Sundays of the year. But this year, the excuse rang hollow.
I still despise crowds, which is the main reason I don't bother with church on the popular days. But I really can't take a break from G-d. I don't want to take a break from G-d. How do you take a break from someone you love? Particularly, if that someone you love is everwhere at all times and very unescapable?
So I am reconsidering taking a break from Church on Easter. But you don't mess with Tradition on a whim. No. It requires thought. Preparation. Incomprensable papers and some gobbly-gook about the Lord is doing a new thing. Actually the Lord is not doing a new thing. He's doing the same old thing, it is me that is changing.
So I've been thinking. Maybe, next year. Easter at someone's 5 o'clock service. A & St.A had a pitiful sinner's service at 5 with 3-4 parishioners. Maybe there is a crowd on Easter but it can't be that much of a crowd. The Church of the Gay Lawyers doesn't have a 5 o'clock communion service and I don't remember if the Church of the Really, Really Blonde People has 5 o'clock service on Easter. Even if they did it could be packed as there were a number of people who showed up on the days I wandered in.
Of course, speaking with Bruce last night before konking off to sleep and he said that Easter Vigil, which I did attend for the 1st time as an Anglican, counts for Easter Sunday. So I've already screwed with Tradition when I attended.

Friday, March 31, 2006

I could just show up

I just called the Church of the Really, Really, Blonde People to volunteer for the Soup kitchen per my Lenten vows (of which I have kept....1) and they don't need anyone Sunday. Monday they have an opening. Dang this is worse than trying to book an appointment with my hairdresser. Of course, I did wait until Friday. Next week I have guests. The week after that is Holy Week. Well I hope to continue this and there will be tons of opportunities when it is Summer and everyone runs off to their summer places.
My summer place? The same as my Winter and Fall place. Which strangely is also my Spring place.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Abdul Rahman

Who will die in the name of Christ our Lord and Saviour? Living here in the States where at the worst people will just call you bad names and talk smack about you for being Christian, it is just, I don't know, when hearing about people whose lives are in jepordy for following Jesus and seeking him. Lucky for Mr. Abdul Rahman of Afganistan he was found mentally incompetent to stand trial and will survive the state putting him to death. Unfortunately, the people of Afganistan, some of them may be a danger to Mr. Rahman and possibly the many Christians who live in secret.
Was the early church like this? Hiding under the guise of being Jewish to avoid death and when having to show their cards, dying?
When you throw death into the mix it does stand to wonder what all that is contained in this demonimation or that you are willing to die for?

Tuesday, March 07, 2006


I went to a couple sites targeting Christians curious about going veggie. Man they were disappointing. Very light and weak on the supporting theology. What really disappointed me was a verse from Isaiah 66 which goes on to say that killing an ox is like killing a man. Curious I looked at the whole chapter. On the surface the chapter is about the kind of worship G-d wants. In the same verse quoted, it goes on to say that grain offerings were as swine's blood. So nothing particularly against killing the ox.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

At play in the fields of the Lord

Well as part of my Lentian excerizes I "fed the homeless". I thought it would be a horrid chore, but it wasn't.
I'm looking forward to the next night I can do this.
I went to the church to help fix sandwiches. Joy and Jim had done most of the work but I made about 2 dozen sandwiches, helped put them in bags and load the bags in the Salvation Army truck. Then Jim, Ron and I drove around serving soup and sandwiches, but mainly sandwiches to homeless people near the EPA, GSA, on K Street, near Mt. Vernon Sq. going to where the people were. It was great seeing the city at night.
Sometimes doing the Lord's work is so cool. I can't wait for another Sunday night in the Salvation Army van.

Tuesday, February 28, 2006


Okey dokey well what am I doing for Lent? Well I'm not giving up chocolate. I'm not doing a lot of stuff but the list for this year is a bit more self improving and moving closer to G-d than last year.
1. Tithe 5% I'm horrid I just do 1%. My pie in the sky thoughts have been doing 10% but, I don't have a strong enough understanding of where my money goes. I know I should give the first offerings to the Almighty. This is an attempt to get closer to that goal.

2. Don't eat out alone. I like food and my friends are cheap. This relates to the money issue. I do spend a good amount eating out. The problem though is, does carry out count as eating out? I'm going to say no, but I should limit it to once a week carry out, including the cafeteria at work.

3. Feed the homeless at least once a month. I got two churches to choose from and I need to volunteer. I gotta talk to Bruce or the guy at my church about our soup kitchen and volunteering for that. Just one Saturday morning to make sandwiches for the unwashed masses and serving Christ.

4. Take one day cleaning up. I've let the house go a bit and when I cleaned up the house, went off to London and came back it was a wonderful feeling to come back to a clean house. So the idea is to devote one day or evening to cleaning up the house.

5. Dance more. How does this bring me closer to G-d? It doesn't. But I am getting asocial hanging around the house.

6. No home computer on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Tech free. Except for the Palm.

Then there are the sorta maybes of Lent, which get broken on Sunday, a feast day anyway so they get broken.
7. Don't buy meat. I'm going to feign some sort of vegitarianism. But I know that's going nowhere.

8. No desserts. Meaning I don't need to end each meal with something sweet, but I'm not going to deny myself of something sweet. Yeah, a lousy rule.

9. Start at 8:30 I know what it means. I'll tell you in person.

Saturday, February 25, 2006


The bottom of the hamper stinks.
That is what I came up with when finally getting around to laundry. And I realize that I washed the whites without soap. Fabric softner yes, detergent, no.

Friday, February 24, 2006

A parody: TV

From a shiny smiley tv christian:
The TV is my shepherd, I shall not want anything else. It maketh me to lie down on the sofa. It leadeth me away from the Scripture. It destroys my soul. It leadeth me in the paths of sex and violence for the sponsor’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will enjoy the evil, for blood and sex they excite me. It’s cable and remote they comfort me. It prepares a commercial before me in the presence of my children. It anoints my head with humanism, My coveting runneth over.

Surely laziness and ignorance shall follow my family all the days of our lives, and we shall dwell in the house watching TV forever.

Thursday, February 16, 2006


Made it to London alive. House being guarded and protected by Mike Henry. And Brett & Ira. Elizabeth alive and well and happy to be in an internet cafe in the basement of a Burger King. Yea!

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Difference of thought

I was listening to the Bookcast about Cosmopolitanism and the author was talking and saying that we do not listen to people with other ideas and opinions. Oh, I listen, but I tend not to engage. Debate is not my strong suite, I know my weaknesses. I describe myself as a moderate conservative, but most of my friends are serval flavors of liberal. I've listened to them and I do gain an understanding of where they are coming from. But that understanding does not equal a change in my point of view.
A problem I've noticed is that people tend to hang around people of similar views, as we naturally do. Unfortunately, as the author pointed out, people who hang out with like people don't understand those who think differently and question the sanity of those who think differently and dismiss them.
That dismissing, which feeds into disrespect makes it hard for different thoughts to come together. The news media doesn't help. They tend to set things up for a fight, a respectful Jerry Springer. Also both sides bring up charactures of the other side. Of course, the charactures tend to readily show up.
The author mentioned something else that stuck with me. Universalism is not the answer either. It is okay if at the end of the day we don't agree. And that's okay with me as long as we can peacefully co-exist finding some deal where the yahoos can be yahoos and live among the nimrods.

Friday, February 03, 2006

How does one do it?

Really. And I am not helping.
There are so many books and articles out there. So many publishers and that's just the dead tree stuff. Throw on the blogs (like this and the other one) the electronic copies of journals, papers, and what have you and there is no way on earth that it is humanly possible to keep up with every opinion.
"You should read/ see/ hear this...."
The only answer is to just agree and forget it, because there is no way for you to read the book or see the movie or hear the podcast of every frickin' thing that is recommended to you. I'm trying to finish a book, loaned to me by another parishioner, by the London trip. I won't make it. Duck Soup has been sitting on my table for nearly a month, waiting for me to view it. I have a podcast back up because I left the palm at home. Oh, NPR is for the evening and the wee morning. I am accustomed to simply missing shows on TV.

Thursday, January 26, 2006


The problem with encountering Bt early in the norning is that he has read the paper when the only thing I've done is pick the thing up out of the yard. On the train he pointed out the article in the Metro section about the little boy who shot a 7 year old classmate. He asked me if I thought the child was evil and the father was creating an evil machine. I didn't read the paper but I heard it on the news, my answer is no. No, I don't believe the child or the parent is evil. Stupid. But not evil. The kid is 8. There is a chance for redemption.
I found myself arguing the liberal side of my church regarding hell and evil. On the way liberal end of my church there is no hell or there is a hell but no one is in it. I don't really believe that but it is really rude to tell people they are going to hell, how Episcopalian is that? On one level I guess it would be lovely if Stalin is hanging out in heaven, because then I have a chance. Bt wasn't buying it. When do these people get redeemed? He asked. I almost mentioned the loving power of Jesus, but I just said G-d. Yeah, it is a weak arguement that criminals and mean people will come into heaven because G-d loves us all sooooooo much that he won't let not one soul escape his loving grace. I don't buy it myself. I'm going with hell is the place where one is far from the love of G-d. Heaven is closer to him and his love. The more love the closer to heaven. Oh and I'm not going to tell anyone they're going to hell because, that's just so rude.

Apparently I'm incapable of independent thought

I'm not going to link to the post that annoyed me, because it isn't just that one I've seen this pop up several times.
Children, people, raised in a household with religion squashes independent thought, is the assertion. Being surrounded by friends, who are liberal and one level of agnostic or downright athestic I'm accustomed to hearing it, but not agreeing. Strangely, I was raised Baptist, stayed with the church till college where I latched on the the Roman Catholic and Episcopal churches. All through then, apparently not one single independent thought entered my head.
Yet my memory tells me different. I wasn't a mindless automiton. Actually I wasn't too aware of whatever the Baptist party line was. Drinking bad. Heck, I coulda figured that part out on my own after dealing with drunken relatives. I had to get out of a alcohol abusing environment such as grad school to see that alcohol had other uses besides getting drunk off your ass. Sleeping around bad. Pregnant girls on my school bus, I'm sure they knew the risks but didn't care. People fighting because of sleeping around, yeah, witnessed that in my neighborhood growing up.
My mother was the more religious one where my dad was very suspious of religion. Mom could not pray in dad's presence because he was afraid that she was "reading the Bible" on him. Just because you don't believe in G-d doesn't make one less supertious. That I observed with my own eyes.
But back to kids or religious people in general who strangely enough are able to build up an independent thought on their own. Faith is not a form of abuse, and depending on the group there is disagreement and divergent thought. There are groups that get caught up with "group think" but it is not limited to religion. See communism. And strangley, some people who grew up in strict or even not so strict religious families have been able to move away from it in adulthood. There are people driving around in cars who grew up Amish and are no longer so. There is probably some guy who grew up in a conservative Jewish family, eating a crab cake sandwich. I know a girl, grew up Buddist but is lapsed. I know a lot of lasped people.
My faith gives me strength to endure and peace, why wouldn't I want to pass it on? We all have our own political and philosophical beliefs that we treasure and want to pass on, is that abuse? It is only true independence when you allow others to disagree with you and have thoughts and ideas that are opposed strongly to yours. I have listened to my friends who have thoughts strongly opposed to my own, and it is their right as Americans to have opposing thoughts, as is mine.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

No really NBC needs one more L&O: Cow Bell

Some of my fellow conservative episkys have bothered to complain about the new NBC program "The Book of Daniel" (link to BoD blog). On the surface it doesn't even look remotely interesting. If all you are selling is "look created 'controversy'" and no real character development then screw them. They aren't even worth protesting. Give me a dead body every week, maybe I'll watch.
No what NBC needs is a new L&O: Stolen Vechile division. I watch the L&Os, of course Trial by Jury was a bit dull. Think, L&O: Stolen Vechile Div. mix Grand Theft Auto with what we love about L&O. Car chases, tough guys, NYC, good stuff. Or just bring back Homicide: Life on the Streets.
Better yet L&O: BWI/DC Homicide. Move the action down to Bawlermore and the District of Columbia. Mix Homicide, lovely views of the Inner Habor and then a few shots of the Mall. Have all crime occur in PG County but suspects, witnesses, possible alibis all live somewhere between Woodbridge, VA and Baltimore Co, MD.