#Rednoseday #joykill

Somewhere in the Bible it says to give without over thinking it.
Screw it, I overthink it, but we give.
A co-worker alerted me that it is Red Nose Day. Now, I remember Red Nose Day from my time in the UK and because I love British Television. So I am aware of it. Not so much aware of how useful it is.
Red Nose Day has jumped the pond and is over here in the Land of the Free & Home of the Brave.
It would help if I actually watched more television but the gist I get is that they are raising money for childhood poverty with promises that lives will be changed. I looked at the website for more information. They are vague on the desired outcomes, well besides wearing red noses and raising money. Not too much on the dull stuff regarding how the money will be used. Couldn't find jack on which organizations will get any of the money raised.
And now my critical thinking skills kick in.
This is bull.
There is something in a charity you know, and you know what they do and you see their work on the ground. There is also something in knowing charities you wouldn't touch with a 10 foot pole because they are ineffective, have bad leadership, engage in things you despise, or something else that doesn't sit well with you. So I wouldn't be quick to support something where I can't see who is doing the heavy lifting and if any heavy lifting is being done and if it is just not a feel good exercise. Maybe there is a list of charities that are being supported by Red Nose Day but it's too buried in the site for my taste if it is there.

Want to feed people?
a. Find people who need food and feed them
b. Find who feeds the people in your community and give them money.

Want to help kids get out of poverty?
1. Figure out what gets kids out of poverty
    a. practice it in your own community
    b. give to organizations that do that thing or set of things that gets kids out of poverty
2. Learn about people who used to be poor children and aren't poor anymore. Tell people what you've learned.

Education is one of the things that helps get people out of poverty. Good education that provides marketable skills. But it is just one of several parts of a ladder needed to help, assist, people out of poverty.

But it is easier to have a party and focus on the spectacle than the hard work.

Short: How Taxes differ from Charitable Giving

Of the many many ways taxes differ from charitable giving is that people don't spend time how they can give less charity, compared to how much effort is given for tax breaks, loopholes, shelters, and the like.

Government taxes isn't charitable giving

I'm going to ignore the greatest type of giving done in America, gifts to religious institutions and talk about other giving.
We give. We give money to food quality groups, advocacy groups, gardening groups, legal groups, local help the helpless groups, arts groups, cultural/history groups, alumni groups and hey-we're-doing-this-cool-thing-and-we-happen-2B-a-nonprofit-groups.
Some money goes to make up for what the local or federal or state government doesn't give, like with alumni groups. Some of our money funds scholarships, so that's less money someone has to take out a loan. Some money helps programs at my (the Help has some negative feelings about his alma mater) old school that aren't funded by the school and probably seem unworthy of fully funding by the people of Florida or Massachusetts. Food stamps are supposed to feed everyone, but they don't. So we give to a program that feeds people on the streets and another that provides families with healthy food options they can cook at home. I know the some arts and cultural programs get a portion of their funding from government sources, but not all, and at some weird times, have their govt funding cut altogether. We give to the museum that the Help is on the board of, they get their basic support from a local government, but to do more programming, that money comes from private sources.
Some money goes to groups who try to get the government to change their mind. I'm thinking of one non-profit that works with refugees and immigrants in the US. I'm also thinking of the bicycling group that tries to get the government to stop hatin' on cyclists with laws and a bureaucratic culture that assumes the cyclist is ALWAYS in the wrong and give us some more bike lanes. I'm thinking of groups that challenge overreach and declined applications for benefits. I'm thinking of gardening groups that might have to fight one part of the local government from seizing and bulldozing over a lot given for community gardening. I'm thinking of food groups that fight a mindset in government given over to big-Ag and junk food.
Then there are the odd-ball groups that do things that would be stupid for the government to do, like Christmas toys for innercity kids, hair for cancer patients (that would be creepy) and crocheted hats for premies.
And almost none of them blow up or kill brown people on the other side of the world in my name, or spy on me or my neighbors, nor do any of the non-profits I give to can put me in jail and take away my property if I don't hand money over to them.

Tough Love

I really wish people would get their "stuff" together.
There is a woman. A character, who shows up near my block who begs for money. If there is one good thing I could say about Cindy the Crackho (later crack dealer), she worked for it. On various occasions I have pointed the beggar to one of several organizations (Bread for the City being one) where she could get a meal, and maybe get in touch with their holistic services, so she can get her stuff together. However, after several interactions with this woman, from making her a sandwich to buying her some groceries, I don't think she's interested in getting her stuff together. That pisses me off. I'm going to have to stop caring about this person because her constant excuses for not lifting herself up (or reaching out to some professionals who can assist) is pissing me off.
I guess I can be more sympathetic to one dimensional characters and strangers.
My sister, more so when she was younger,  was a person who didn't have their stuff together. I love my sister. It was a good thing that we were several states away because there was stuff she'd do that would make me so angry, that if we lived in the same town, I'd have a criminal record. If I didn't love her, I wouldn't have cared.
Love is not just rainbows and soft cotton candy. It can be painful, painful to see the people you love not doing their best, being less than what they are or can be, wasting themselves. It is really hard with family members who you love, especially if one or more is on a downward or circular spiral and would really like it if you didn't mess with their trajectory.
Jesus calls us to love our neighbors and our enemies. I struggle with that. Besides the obvious, there is the problem (with those falling under "neighbor") of having to have your heart broken in that love. Or to be torn.

Charity, friends and family and aquaintences

19-21"There once was a rich man, expensively dressed in the latest fashions, wasting his days in conspicuous consumption. A poor man named Lazarus, covered with sores, had been dumped on his doorstep. All he lived for was to get a meal from scraps off the rich man's table. His best friends were the dogs who came and licked his sores. 22-24"Then he died, this poor man, and was taken up by the angels to the lap of Abraham. The rich man also died and was buried. In hell and in torment, he looked up and saw Abraham in the distance and Lazarus in his lap. He called out, 'Father Abraham, mercy! Have mercy! Send Lazarus to dip his finger in water to cool my tongue. I'm in agony in this fire.' 25-26"But Abraham said, 'Child, remember that in your lifetime you got the good things and Lazarus the bad things. It's not like that here. Here he's consoled and you're tormented. Besides, in all these matters there is a huge chasm set between us so that no one can go from us to you even if he wanted to, nor can anyone cross over from you to us.' 27-28"The rich man said, 'Then let me ask you, Father: Send him to the house of my father where I have five brothers, so he can tell them the score and warn them so they won't end up here in this place of torment.' 29"Abraham answered, 'They have Moses and the Prophets to tell them the score. Let them listen to them.' 30"'I know, Father Abraham,' he said, 'but they're not listening. If someone came back to them from the dead, they would change their ways.' 31"Abraham replied, 'If they won't listen to Moses and the Prophets, they're not going to be convinced by someone who rises from the dead.'" "The Message Luke 16: 19-31

I think of this when I think of charitable giving or giving to others. I would like to note that there was some familarity between the rich man and Poor Lazarus, as the man requests that Lazarus, who he names, come down and provide him with some relief. Jesus also has something to say about the stranger and charity with the story of the Good Samaratin.
What does the above have to do with my thoughts now? Dunno, I figure it would take too long to link the following to the above.
Some friends, who have been carrying a burden have gotten to the point where they are asking for monetary help. They've been asking for prayers, but the battle, like all wars, has gotten expensive. They are middle class Americans, but certain things, which I won't write about to respect their privacy, can cripple you financially. Knowing how hard it can be for normally independent people to ask for help, I am thankful for the opportunity to do something more.
Though I don't know if or how it counts this also has me thinking of financially aiding poorer relations. I've been sending my parents just enough money to keep them in Starbucks for a couple of weeks. Not much. Gas money, really. Mom has access to an account of mine that I need to periodically take money out of so it doesn't become too much of a temptation. For I noticed my family get all sorts of plans in their heads about how to spend the money when it gets over $1000. She'll take money out to cover insurance or a light bill or taxes. Fine. It's there for those kinds of things.
Then there are my new relatives, my in-laws. I don't know what they need, or how to give it. With my own, I know where I can be bossy and where to lay off. Since the Help's MO for the longest while was to check in once a quarter and visit once a year with his people, I don't know what the score is. Also culturally it's different, west coast and somewhat whitish. They talk about it being hard with budget cuts and the state fooling with the pensions. Okay. I can see where any charity offered can step on toes (undermining sense of being a provider or adequate parent). So right now I'm just taking it as grousing and not a call for help. And there is another help that is asked for that we are too far away to do.
I'm also thinking of help offered to people we sort of know from a distance. I'm thinking of someone's legal battle that thankfully is over, but the bills were big and it kept dragging on and on. They asked for help and I wrote checks. Small checks and I wish they could have been bigger.

Pray for Haiti

At church they took up a collection for Catholic Relief Services. I put in $2, not much, because I didn't bring the checkbook and I'd like to take it off on the taxes. Haiti is mainly Catholic and so it is fitting in with my philosophy of giving, which is if you were in Haiti before the quake, I'd probably give you money.
I gave to the Salvation Army, since it was the sad report from a Salvation Army dude that was one of the early reports out of the country. I sent $25 to them. I'll probably give more next week to Catholic Relief Services.
People are taking money everywhere for the relief effort. The coffee shop down the street, my hairdresser, everyone. I'm going to try to stick with the people who were in Haiti before the disaster so that when the spotlight leaves, I know they will still be there.

One woman mission

If there is anyone who ministers to whiny bloggers with the cold or flu (I got no clue as to what I have), fyi, I need help.

Got a quick call from Mom this morning. In passing she mention this woman she knows, and whose name is familiar to me, who dropped off a few loaves of bread for her and some hot dog buns for my sister. We talked about this. It was this woman's mission, give bread away. That's it, bread. Hot dog buns, hamburger buns, white bread, bready bread, bread and give it away. If you know enough people willing to take the charity, and you've got enough bread, you've got yourself a mission. What idea. Picking one little thing you can do, and going out into the world and doing it. And it is so small it doesn't require government aid, nor a large organization or even a church structure (though I suspect church ties do play a part).
A radio program I listen to occasionally does a 'giving hour' where callers call in and tell their tales of giving. The easy ones are leaving a huge tip to an IHOP waitress, like $100 tip. The trickier ones are anonymously leaving money to families they know are experiencing hardship, because there are so many things that can go wrong in the execution of the giving and the interpretation of the receiving.
Bread. Well if you know the people and you know they'll take the bread, that sounds like a pretty decent mission.

Hating Poor People bc They're Poor, Makes As Much Sense As Hating the Rich bc They're Rich

I was in a situation where I encountered what definitely had a whiff of 'ew, poor people' about it. Diversity isn't without its challenges. When I advertise the room out I try to weed out the people who just can't deal with poor people period. However I'll take the people who will later have solid reasons for disliking certain poor people. But I digress a bit.
Coming from an impoverished American background and now being quite and unapologetically bourgie, I do meet other members of the middle class, raised that way, who have no patience or sympathy for the poor. Or maybe what I'm sensing is a lack of obligation to the poor, particularly when the poor people in question live in the same friggin neighborhood as you and you have to deal with them as people and not as an abstraction. The spirit of the dislike of the immediate poor seems to me to have the same air about it as the dislike of the rich for the simple fact that the rich are rich.

Good luck with that & Merry Christmas

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

At our church we have an advent tree where there are little paper angels with the names of kids 'for whom Christmas is not a given'. So individuals at the church grab an angel and get and wrap gifts the children have requested. I bypassed the simple requests for hats and gloves and picked a teenager who wanted a stereo or a boombox. I've learned my lesson. Next year, hats & gloves. I did by a $50 boombox and I hope the young man likes it.
Fr. K made a mention of some extra, late angels that appeared on the tree a few weeks ago and one angel had a request for a Playstation. Fr. K didn't know what a Playstation , but to him it sounded expensive. So to the kid who asked for a Playstation..... good luck with that & Merry Christmas.