Okay, I give up.
I admit I came on strong and got a little overboard. And was told to back off a bit. And I did, and came back toned down a bit, and even that was too much apparently. So I throw up my hands and declare until there is some sort of clarity on the other person's part because I'm no f*ing mind reader, I'm just letting it go.
Mixed signals are a pain. I don't want to play the game where you are encouraged to do X, then get a note frustrated that you did X. There could be other pressures, but since I'm not privy to those other things, and under the current circumstances probably won't be privy to them, I can't be bothered until those other things can be worked out. I would love to be bothered, and would take on the burden as suited to my position. However this level of frustration is above what I can deal with right now.
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