The Message

First off I want to thank Nora Bombay's ex-roommate, the hardest working lesbian ex-Episcopal priest, for whom this post would not be possible. When NB's roommate left NoVa for NYC she left behind bibles and other religiously themed books. Those books wound up with me. Some I sold, some I gave away, and some I kept. Of those Bibles is 'The Message', which is like the regular Bible but on crack, or drunk or off its meds. Don't get me wrong I like "The Message" but sometimes I compare it with the normal NIV and think, 'Gad this is wacky.' For example (via Biblegateway):
NIV- The Cost of Following Jesus

18When Jesus saw the crowd around him, he gave orders to cross to the other side of the lake. 19Then a teacher of the law came to him and said, "Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go."

20Jesus replied, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head."

21Another disciple said to him, "Lord, first let me go and bury my father."

22But Jesus told him, "Follow me, and let the dead bury their own dead."

Now the Message-

Your Business Is Life, Not Death
18-19When Jesus saw that a curious crowd was growing by the minute, he told his disciples to get him out of there to the other side of the lake. As they left, a religion scholar asked if he could go along. "I'll go with you, wherever," he said.

20Jesus was curt: "Are you ready to rough it? We're not staying in the best inns, you know."

21Another follower said, "Master, excuse me for a couple of days, please. I have my father's funeral to take care of."

22Jesus refused. "First things first. Your business is life, not death. Follow me. Pursue life."

In this example our Savior is being hard. The translation is, ah, different. No birds with nests in the Message, just we're camping and leave your father.