tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-99124452024-03-13T22:17:05.915-04:00Crappy Christian"Practicing" Christian, because one day I'll get it right.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.comBlogger409125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-40210519148420927002019-01-05T20:45:00.000-05:002019-01-05T20:45:32.177-05:00Saint Thomas More for my Government ShutdownSo this shutdown is getting bad. I've been in DC for two decades and when I was first hired I suffered through the 21 day 1995-1996 shutdown. That sucked. But I survived. Hey- Hey.<br />
As this weekend passes and we get closer to the first missed payday, I'm getting worried. I'd been praying off and on for an end to the shutdown, for a short shutdown.<br />
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In the middle of the week, I popped into church on my way to the grocery store. I just happen to see a woman I've seen at mass, an odd old bird, and remembered that the church was open. So I walked over and lit two candles. I had no idea, or couldn't remember which saint would cover this situation.<br />
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Tonight, for mass, I once again plopped in money for candles and pray for an intercession from a saint. This time I decided to actually do a search for a saint who would cover this government shutdown. Google brought me St. Thomas More.<br />
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Ah.<br />
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That changed my whole mindset. My prior prayers for intercession from saint TBD, it was simply to ask for the government shutdown to end quickly so I could get back to work. As a history student, the Tudor/ Stuart period was my area study, so I remember St. Thomas More. So instead of praying for an end to the shutdown, I prayed for strength to endure. Oh, I really want the shutdown to end, but I need to seek strength in my G-d, rather than my job.<br />
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To know if someone is a saint or not, ask, does this person point me to Jesus? That's their job, pointing you to Jesus. It's not if they were nice, because some saints were total jackazzes for Christ, Saint You-Can't-Do-This-To-Me-I'ma-Roman-Citizen Paul for one. St. Thomas More reminded me of Jesus. Not that I'm in the habit of forgetting Jesus, but my Lord is not always on my mind as he should. I am the Lord's servant first of all, and a civil servant secondly.<br />
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So I leave the shutdown in the Lord's hands. He will bring me back to work in his good time. This is all to his good, part of his unknowable plan, my job is to trust in him. Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-57609522851529767602018-10-09T21:15:00.000-04:002018-10-09T21:15:06.177-04:00Okay, I was wrongWell I had this feeling, not a strong one, that Kavanaugh would not become a Supreme Court justice, when he was announced. It took longer than normal. And there was the accusations that delayed things.<br />
But his hair remained poofy and he was confirmed.<br />
<br />
I still believe something will happen to RGB and William Shatner close together.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-74925729399176788382018-07-11T17:00:00.000-04:002018-07-11T17:00:16.652-04:00Feelings- Mari's Future PredicitonsOkay, if I could I would bet money on these.<br />
<br />
More recent: I have a feeling, not super strong, but a feeling, Brett Kavanaugh won't be confirmed. When I told my husband this and he asked why. I said his hair was too poofy. Yes, I know that is a stupid reason. If you want a good reason, but not the reason that made me come to that conclusion, there are enough Congressmen and people who want to push back or RESIST Trump to fail him.<br />
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Speaking of Trump, I have a feeling, he'll be re-elected. This is not wishful thinking. Believe me, I'm not wishing this on us.<br />
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I also have a feeling that William Shatner and Ruth Bader Ginsburg will go around about the same time. The Notorious RBG might actually outlive the Trump administration. Spite, it's what kept Castro alive. I have no idea what's keeping Shatner alive.<br />
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If you know me and want to bet Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-25724879175724389452018-06-07T17:30:00.000-04:002018-06-07T17:30:14.016-04:00The Roman Empire- An appreciationSo if we're not completely pooped my husband will read a chapter or section of verses from the Bible before praying and passing off to sleep. So Paul has been running around the Roman Empire and makes his way back to Jerusalem. I was impressed with his travels because after the fall of the empire this would have been much harder if not impossible.<br />
<br />
A few months ago I was going through a fall of Rome kick. I was greatly enjoying <a href="https://wondery.com/shows/the-fall-of-rome-podcast/" target="_blank">Wondery's Fall of Rome</a> followed by <a href="https://wondery.com/shows/tides-of-history/" target="_blank">Tides of History</a>, and some Great Courses on the topic. The Roman Empire had a very functional transportation and trade system. This system that connected the southern part of Britain to Egypt and Mesopotamia. More importantly it connected a middle eastern backwater to this whole system. Super duper bonus points if you remember that Paul (the murderer formerly known as Saul) was a Roman Citizen, and he did whip out his citizenry to complain about his treatment at the hands of locals.<br />
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If Jesus came before Israel became a client state of Rome how far would his message get? The Egyptian Empire was comparatively small and not as diverse. And what do we remember that Empire for? Wealthy kings and queens and pyramids. Also the Jews may have spent too much time complaining about the Egyptians treatment of them during the time of slavery if they were the client state of Egypt.<br />
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If Jesus came after the fall of Rome, probably the same result. Maybe the Gospel would have to compete with Islam . It probably would not go farther than where ever Jewish merchants and other Jews were settled.<br />
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So here's to you Pax Romanus! Yes, the oppression was bad. You did kill our savior, but there is plenty of blame to go around for that. You provided the roads and merchant networks that allowed the author of a huge chunk of the New Testament to run around, meet various cultures, tell them of how great Jesus is, because he is, and providing the symbol of death that showed his triumph over it.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-29771666520807803102018-06-06T16:30:00.000-04:002018-06-06T16:30:11.848-04:00Forgivness, what it is and isn't<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/inshaw/7387514124/in/photolist-cfNWzb-5vKfVg-9iL6cs-5gvx6z-6Gv3v6-3WUzST-5gvx3c-4eRr3G-4dMpM9-5vKg2M-5vPB3y-5vPAVG-cfNVLs-4dMoUJ-FWT2hM-9QLFjb-4dHqdH-FNHejY-3oRhc5-F2ruJu-5TXGPG-9iL4SU-NyYX9-Jp9Mo-NyYXQ-dCXQxu-9kWaVQ-9QHQh6-NzrSX-4vsAuA-XHMKh-7Sf5D-FR2e9Z-n5ucSn-bfSE42-FwLucw-3oR7yJ-3WQrmz-i1Dbbf-3oLFoD-bwDzJj-3oR77Q-Jp9Md-n5vXgW-21mXZM-F2ruVw-5ypvey-34uuj7-notZmF-26iuKcv" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" title="steeple damage"><img alt="steeple damage" height="75" src="https://farm8.staticflickr.com/7098/7387514124_5877a32088_s.jpg" width="75" /></a><script async="" charset="utf-8" src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js"></script><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This is a cross post from another blog, <a href="https://anelderabuseobserved.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Fi<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">nancial </span>Eldercare Abuse</a></span><a href="https://anelderabuseobserved.blogspot.com/" target="_blank"> Observed</a>.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">This Sunday was my monthly visit to my husband's church and the sermon topic was taken from Matthew 18:21-35; Romans 12: 9-21; Colossians 3:13, forgiveness. Sonya, my sister in law, did something horrible. She stole and she lied. She inadvertently placed a burden on her brother, because conservatorships are a huge expensive PITA, that constantly set him up for failure. Eldercare abuse takes years off of the victims and in my eyes her actions killed her mother. I also know that I will forgive her. This was the sermon I needed to hear.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">First the pastor defined what forgiveness was not. <b>It is not forgetting</b>. As long as we can remember this episode we will remember. However, my husband is taking on my aunt's (and mother's) habit of 'selective memory' as a coping mechanism. I remember too much. <b>It is not denying pain</b>. And there is pain. Some of the pain is part of the lies told by Sonya regarding other things, such as her children's custody. I can attest to the financial pain. We used funds from our emergency fund to pay for the lawyers for the conservatorship. Money set aside to cover our mortgage was taken to pay for my mother in law's medications. My mother in law, like my husband, can get some things very close to the vest, but there were hints that she was hurt by her daughter Sonya, and probably felt betrayed. <b>Forgiveness is not denying there are consequences</b>. Pardon is optional. It seems my husband has given Sonya pardon by not pursuing pressing charges against her as the conservator of his mother and her estate. I highly doubt he will before the statute of limitations runs out. His mother is dead. The credit bureaus, Social Security, Kaiser Mid-Atlantic, the bank, CalSTRs, and everyone who needed to know, have been informed she is dead. Her death was a consequence of what her daughter did. The money Sonya spent on trips to Wal-Mart and Ubers for her son, was not there to fix her mother's teeth, That would have been $8,000. The money used to support Sonya and her lifestyle was not there to allow her brother to place their mother back at the Atria, and thus she had to rot in the cheapest accommodation in San Jose, where there was nothing left to do but wait for death and watch TV. <b>Forgiveness does not mean you have to trust the person</b>. Loss of trust was another consequence of this whole episode and it unfortunately globed on to other people. Most of the time my husband is a very trusting guy, maybe too trusting. He does not trust his sister, There are some other family members who were bit players, and innocents who are seen with a bit of distrust as well. He's not sure if they are in league with or under the influence of Sonya. And there are those we know weren't siding with Sonya and were also hurt by her, that my husband is not too sure of either. I don't like this side of him, it makes him seem paranoid. We don't trust Sonya, she has lied too much.<b> Forgiveness does not mean you have to like the person</b>. Jesus calls us to love our enemies. Love meaning wanting the best for them. We want Sonya to get the professional mental health services she needs, and we want her to stick with a good program. We want her to keep a job and serve her clients by being dependable. We want her to marry someone who can help provide stability for her remaining minor child, or at least learn to love herself and not feel that she needs a man around. Lastly,<b> forgiveness does not mean you throw out justice</b>. An injustice was done. A woman who trusted her daughter to care for her, gave that daughter access to her nest egg and made herself vulnerable. That daughter took advantage and has not been made to answer for the crime of financial elder abuse. That sense of injustice is why I wrote th<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">e</span> blog, <a href="https://anelderabuseobserved.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Financial Eldercare Abuse Observed</a>.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">But then what is forgiveness? <b>Forgiveness is letting go of the anger and bitterness</b>. This is slowly happening. It happens with my husband because of that 'selective memory'. By going over the financials, I think it is getting out of my system. Sonya is more than likely homeless, due to her mental illness and inability to support herself, I can't really punish her more than what life has already done. <b>Forgiveness is not bringing it up again</b>. We are commanded to stop treating the person like they still owe the debt. She couldn't pay the debt even if she got her life together and if by some crazy miracle she got a million dollars, who would she pay the debt to? The victim is dead. We can't un-cremate my mother in law and bring her back to life with all the money in the world. <b>Forgiveness is giving G-d the ultimate vengeance</b>. We are all sinners. I believe Sonya will have to answer to the Father, even if she doesn't believe in him. There is another point but it doesn't fit neatly so I'm leaving it off.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Jesus has forgiven us for the heap of sin we placed on him and that he washed away with his blood. Like the servant in Matthew 18, we owe a huge debt that we could never repay* and it has been forgiven. We can stand to forgive others who, comparatively owe us a smaller debt. I will forgive Sonya as we continue to clean up the mess she made and the damage done. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">*Debt is one way of seeing it, trespass is another, but let's go with debt since we're hanging with the Presbyterians. </span></span>Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-79360618356765088942018-05-29T17:00:00.000-04:002018-05-29T17:00:03.185-04:00Marriage- the topic of this week's homilyThis Memorial Day weekend my regular priest was off with some GW students running around Rome so we had the former Anglican priest. Also the crowd was light, and the regular people who take the collection were not there as well, so I and my Protestant husband decided we would take the collection. Because I normally am not the lead I was trying to figure out at what point in the mass do we walk up and walk our way back taking collection, and we had a 8 mo baby with us, I really wasn't listening closely to the homily.<br />
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It didn't help that the priest didn't seem to have his microphone on, but the topic was marriage. I accept and hold the Church's teaching on marriage. I am aware that another parishioner struggles with this teaching, and he and his non-Catholic partner/spouse were in attendance. So I was slightly concerned about them, in between searching on line to figure out when were we supposed to collect the money (I don't pay attention, I just know it comes at the end of the prayers of the people). After taking communion I patted his shoulder to sort of relay, 'hey, I want you to stick around and keep on struggling.'<br />
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Because people like to coo over our baby son, and apparently taking the collection with a baby strapped to you is a huge hit, we didn't catch up to the other parishioner and his spouse until we spotted them in the self-checkout. Because they were nearly done and we were just about to start the conversation was very short. My fellow parishioner's spouse said he was asleep during the homily. So it's a non-issue for him. However the parishioner was awake, and they sit close enough to hear an acoustic priest, and he was very sure that the priest was incorrect in stating that cohabiting couples pretend that they are married. My husband and I both strongly disagreed. I have observed it with straight and gay cohabiting couples refer to their partner/boyfriend as their husband. My <a href="https://anelderabuseobserved.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">elder abusing sister in law</a> did it with her baby daddy and numerous gay couples, or one part of the couple, have named their partner as 'husband'. He then responded about something regarding the city's laws regarding common law marriage. <br />
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Our conversation didn't last long. Both men were dealing with health challenges and needed to get home. I expect to see one or both next week or the week after that. I appreciate knowing them, even though one of them seems to trap you in conversation.<br />
<br />
But on the topic of marriage, apparently common law marriage and getting legal recognition is tricky and not something you fall into. Marriage is also different than shacking up.<br />
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<br />Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-40399090331735784622018-05-14T22:33:00.002-04:002018-05-14T22:33:20.663-04:00Rambling thoughts on poverty<a data-flickr-embed="true" data-footer="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/inshaw/8558754393/in/dateposted-public/" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" title="BatesSt68kids"><img alt="BatesSt68kids" height="500" src="https://farm9.staticflickr.com/8386/8558754393_600ef3228b.jpg" width="330" /></a><script async="" charset="utf-8" src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js"></script>So I'll probably need to make a list for confession. Recently, I have been imbibing in some rather mean spirited YouTube videos. They are feeding my judgy side. They are about a kind of people found in my ethnic group in my country who are a result of what happens when you have the Sexual Revolution and the Great Society running hand in hand in the sunset. The only good that has come from this, and I'll need to tell YouTube to stop having them appear, is they are a good reminder of why a guaranteed income is probably a bad idea.<br />
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When I first heard of a universal guaranteed income I thought it was a good idea. The idea being, get rid the various government agencies for the poor and just give the poor the money. I liked the idea of smaller government and believed that the robots will take our jobs. But then I was reminded of the negatives and the road to Hell the negatives paved with free government money.<br />
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The problem of growing single mother headed households is one. This I will put at the feet of the Great Society, which provided the financial incentive, and the Sexual Revolution which took away the shame. Yes, no one is going to get rich on welfare and food stamps. And yes, we should have a safety net. However, both have made my ethnic group suffer. Too many Black children are being raised by single mothers, which makes them poorer (spiritually and financially) than children with both parents and siblings where they share the same mother and father. I have recently become a mother and I don't think I could do this well without my husband. This is especially true when are darling little boy has deprived me of precious sleep and I am not fully functional.<br />
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What does this have to do with Christianity? Well Christ mentioned that the poor will always be with us. No generation will have the luxury of not having to deal with the poor. Besides making sure they don't starve, we do a disservice when we discourage the things that will get them out of poverty (good schools, teaching skills that are actually in demand, etc) and encourage things that make their life worse (broken families, passing students on to the next grade without the skills, excusing behavior that makes them unemployable).Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-22130104896065247452018-04-08T15:37:00.000-04:002018-04-08T15:37:08.908-04:00When the Seventh Day Adventists came overMy husband is Presbyterian. I am a Roman Catholic. Our son is an unbaptized babyman who we'll baptize as either as a Presbyterian or Catholic around the age most kids are confirmed. We live near several other churches and a mosque and there is a 7th Day Adventist church on our street that tries to be helpful with some of our neighborhood struggles (ie the old men on the corner who sell heroin). And we've tried to be friendly with various representatives from the church, including them in some block activities and maybe showing up at events that they hold open to the community.<br />
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One day in passing (Saturday most likely) I mentioned to a lady from the 7th Day church that my mother in law had passed away. Later that week I get an email from her asking if she and someone else from the church could stop by. So later in the week she and the pastor came by. We talked about the babyman, how great Mike's church is for families, how their church is trying to attract more families, and eventually Mike's mom. They also came with cards and gifts. The card was signed by various people in the church expressing sympathy. It was really sweet. At the conclusion of the visit the pastor led a prayer.<br />
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It was a Christian thing.<br />
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Nope not gonna nitpix about theological differences.<br />
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The body of Christ is good.<br />
<br />
Amen.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-43395186819137557452017-11-29T16:14:00.000-05:002017-11-29T16:14:15.387-05:00Fear G-DFear the Almighty,<br />
like your electrical panel. Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-59791878770912539922016-11-10T13:17:00.000-05:002016-11-10T13:17:01.405-05:00Simply<a href="http://biblehub.com/luke/6-27.htm" target="_blank">LUKE 6:27</a><br />
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But to you who hear I say, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you<br />
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AND<br />
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<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="50006028">bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.</a><br />
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This is for all of our friends. Liberal, conservative, neoconservative and libertarian. Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-66160629819885331312016-10-01T13:23:00.001-04:002016-10-01T13:23:41.843-04:00Feelings of the futureFirst, doom, doom and more doom, with a side of doom.<br />
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I've had 'feelings' about the future. Most would come in the dreams that stuck with me, minus the dream about the pillow sized chocolate bar I dreamed of as a kid. Sometimes as 'feelings', I no better word. I predicted the presidency (of the US) since about Reagan with some fuzziness somewhere around the Bush II years. This year I feel Mr. Trump will be president, even though all signs point to other outcomes.<br />
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I also feel that my dear husband will have boys. When he gave me a call about a birthmother wanting to interview us earlier this year, I was excited until I heard that she was carrying a girl. It is not that I want boys over girls, as I think of boys, males in general, as idiotic mobile pee units. Girls follow directions and sit still more often than boys, or guys or my beloved husband. So I knew it wasn't going to work out but I figured the interview, later interviews, would be a good experience. Maybe that experience will bring me closer to my own loud, squirmy, mobile pee units. Even with the doom.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-12399890596096964762016-08-19T08:16:00.002-04:002016-08-19T08:16:52.343-04:00The Community of SaintsI was listening to a Focus on the Family podcast about perinatal hospice, and the struggle with the family's faith while they prepared for the death of their unborn child. And being a historian I thought about the countless stories in the past of stillborn and infant death and the families in the Anglo speaking world's (sticking with the material I know) pain, suffering and loss; a particular pain that is less felt among middle class Christians in America.<br />
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I love the community of saints, those throughout time and space who worship our G-d, who have suffered. Some suffering is unique to their particular place and time, as I doubt few people will have to go through what some of their early martyrs had to endure. But with demands of a bigger and more controlling government over everyday life, I can imagine it could return in another form.<br />
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The Christians of the past who maintained the faith provide me strength. So do the saints of the present who point to Christ and help me find my way to him also support my walk. It is not only in their success but mainly in their suffering. I think of Barbara, the mother of my husband's old landlord, who lost her sight after a stroke of some sort. She accepted this with such grace, saying it wasn't what she wanted but what G-d willed. She remained cheerful and strong through the various other health challenges age brought her family.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-13378456262234928612016-08-08T13:22:00.000-04:002016-08-08T13:22:01.911-04:00Same G-dIn the Sunday Washington Post Magazine there was a piece about an African refugee camp where the residents are trying to escape the violence of the Sudan. One of the photographs was of a barn with benches, well a church, but it looked like a barn with benches. The caption said it was a Presbyterian church. Outside the church you could see children? other people through the wire "windows".<br />
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Sunday was my monthly obligation to attend my husband's suburban Presbyterian church.<br />
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So in my mind I was comparing the two. Not to go into too much detail and kill too much prose, we are in an earthly heaven. My husband and his fellow congregants don't and probably will not encounter some of the struggles as those Presbyterians in the camp. They both will struggle with sin, envy, adultery, idolatry, and the like. However it would probably express itself differently. Still sin, regardless of the quality of the water. Jesus died for all of us.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-84481274080011657472016-07-29T15:30:00.001-04:002016-07-29T15:30:38.561-04:00Foreign missionariesI'm still waiting to see missionaries from Africa and Asia to bring the Gospel of Jesus Christ to the heathen westerners.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-83785844539341499812016-07-17T13:45:00.002-04:002016-07-17T13:45:46.701-04:00Judgy Post- There is only one man who defines me and his name is JesusI have a small irritation with other women, it is those who define themselves by their romantic relationships. Or worse double down and move in/ shack up with some guy.<br />
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Yes, being single can suck. I was a 40 year old bride. I was single for at least 22 of my adult years. I never lived with a boyfriend, and did not date a lot (10 years not dating anyone), so I spent a lot of time not being in a romantic relationship. But on the plus side one of my needs for survival (shelter) was not wrapped up with another person who had no obligations to me. Thinking back to the number of times I broke up with Jochen, it was good that I could just cry about it in my own house, or the house I was sharing with roommates.<br />
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Even those not shacked up there is the constant serial monogamy. Just broke up? Find a new guy! The constant up and down roller coaster ride where she never gets off but just switches which car she's in. Yes, guys do it do, where they want you to judge them by the improvement in eye candy he has hanging from his arm. There might not be the same level of pressure to have someone around, so others can judge your worth.<br />
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The problem with being in constant relationship mode is you don't have time to really reflect who you really are when you're not trying to please, cajole, react to, placate, or consider a significant other. People are looking for their 'authentic' self, but how do you find that authentic person when you're not alone? How do you love yourself and learn to do so when you're constantly looking for others to do it for you; usually not you, but the idea of you. <br />
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I knew my worth, that I was loved and my G-d helped confirm it in the blood of his son. By the time it finally clicked and I understood that deep, deep love of Jesus, I was married..... which makes no sense.<br />
<br />
I do love my husband. Trying to make him truly my other half has rubbed against my independent woman self. So independent woman gets the boot for the sake of marriage. But I see other women, not married, throwing their independent selves under the bus for some guy. The only man a woman should sacrifice her self, her life, is for Jesus, because he did it first, and better.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-67767107712106856202016-06-22T19:12:00.000-04:002016-06-22T19:12:14.452-04:00Thoughts about my gay catholic friendsToday we went to the funeral mass of a very beautiful man who even in hospice was full of life and faith. Anthony was 78 years old. With G-d's help he remained sober for 31 years. The same amount of time he had been with his same sex partner.<br />
For the majority of the time I've been attending my church, he attended alone. After the cancer, again, when he began getting weaker, his partner John began showing up. Sitting at his side.<br />
I sometimes joke, in my head, that I attend the "gay" mass, and you can't say that I left the Episcopal Church to get away from gays, because if that was so, I failed miserably. I appreciate their presence, because unlike some others who struggle with the Church, they are at least there. I heard a priest once say that you didn't have to agree with 100% of what the Church teaches but you have to be willing to listen to what she does teach.<br />
Homosexuality is not a burden I bear. I have my own struggles and I try to hear what the Church has to tell me regarding my particular sins and troubles.<br />
Anthony loved the Church, he loved Mother Mary. I believe the saints have a job and that is to point us to Christ, Anthony did that too. If you spoke with him, you'd know this.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-40326101667034975212016-04-11T12:04:00.002-04:002016-04-11T12:04:49.025-04:00Pontius Pilot Bureaucrat <i><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">This is probably theologically wrong and I totally accep</span>t that</span>.</i><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Over the past few years I have heard the scriptures regarding Jesus' being brought before Pontius Pilate, the one the few humans mentioned in the Nicene Creed. When I hear Luke 23 and my Lord being treated like a hot potato between Herod and Pilot I cannot but think of two bureaucratic systems doing what bureaucratic systems do, particularly when they have no interest in the person, issue or whatever they are shuffling around.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">We probably should be thankful that Pilot and Herod didn't decide to just have my Lord rot in prison, claiming they lost the paper work and that they need to let investigations and processes work their way through the system and they'll get back to the screaming crowds when their main investigator comes back from leave. G-d's will was done. Jesus suffered at the hands of the Roman and local governments, was put to death by the state, so that he may redeem us all.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Federal or local government oppressing you and making you suffer? Our Lord knows your pain. </span>Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-7057529131167457842015-10-22T22:14:00.003-04:002015-10-22T22:14:29.580-04:00Segregated Churches Should Go the Way of the DodoI just got out of a meeting.<br />
The meeting was hosted by the department of transportation and it was filled with a lot of angry old black people from the United House of Prayer and other black churches. They were there to protect the diagonal parking they have grown accustomed to having. They apparently also <a href="http://odd.greatergreaterwashington.org/files/2015/uhopbike.pdf" target="_blank">sent a letter </a>to DDOT to say that taking away the diagonal parking was infringing on their religious liberties.<br />
Bull crap.<br />
Religious liberty does not extend to crap you don't own. Like the street. Driving and parking is not a tenet of faith, but then again, UHOP believes in firehose baptisms maybe parking on public city streets is part of it too......I consider them as Christian as Mormons and 7th day Adventists.<br />
But there were members from Baptist churches too, there to support the Afro-centric United House of Prayer. And I was reminded of one of the reasons why I left the black church. My G-d is not my culture and the black church sometimes gets into the business of worshiping Black history. In this case mistaking the privilege to park in front of their church building with following Christ.<br />
There was a claim that black churches were being driven out of the neighborhood and someone mentioned 10 black churches that were in the neighborhood are no longer there. Well, one "church" on my street died out because everyone was over the age of 90. Another church around the corner, the screaming ladies church, they sold their building because their crowd of screamy ladies was getting smaller. I attend one of the few desegregated churches in the neighborhood. Right now the demographic of the 5:30 mass is well, gay, and evenly black and white with a few asians and latinos sprinkled in.<br />
The Help's church is also desegregated. Yes predominately white, but there are Africans, from Africa there. There are also South Asians from IDK Pakistan/India. A buncha Chinese people go there too.<br />
You know what is great about a desegregated church? A wonderful reminder of heaven and the diversity of the body of Christ. Also we worship a triune god, not our culture as some ethnic churches may stray and do.<br />
So yes, there are fewer black churches. Good. Lets have Christian churches instead.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-65878643405837265402015-10-09T08:25:00.000-04:002015-10-09T08:25:27.268-04:00Pope Catholic.... News at 11Just in case you weren't sure. The pope is Catholic. He was a priest and an archbishop before that.<br />
But you know, people, including you and me, are going to hear what they want to hear and see what they want to see.<br />
There are those expecting Pope Frankie to have women priests, blessing gender-neutral marriage, promoting contraception and laying off abortion. Basically giving into the sexual revolution and becoming irrelevant like the CofE.<br />
Pope Frankie is trying to make the Church more open and welcoming without tossing her teachings to the side. She is a hospital for the sin sick soul in a world that thinks it's healthy.Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-32217017328444636212015-09-15T13:46:00.000-04:002015-09-15T13:46:59.959-04:00Things I need to save up for confession or people in theaters are badIt is very hard for me to see a movie, in the theaters, because they lead me to sin.<br />
<br />
What sin?<br />
<br />
I violate the commandment, thou shalt not kill, because I have thoughts of wanting my fellow moviegoers dead.<br />
<br />
Before you go calling the local authorities, I need to say I do not wish for a repeat of horrible tragedies carried out by mentally disturbed men in theaters. No. I don't want that. I'm not going to kill anybody.<br />
<br />
My sinful self just wants the person who decided that this movie wasn't as interesting as their cell phone to die. Such violent passion boils in my blood when, after I have paid what $11 or so bucks for myself, plus the ticket for my husband and maybe, just maybe a overpriced popcorn and bottled water, over $40 in total, some *&^$! ruins the experience by whipping out their cell phone and checking Facebook or their texts or (yes this has happened) talking on their cell phone during the movie.<br />
<br />
I am reminded what I dislike about my fellow humans and cease to love them.<br />
This happens so often that there are very few movies I will see in the theater. Opening week of a superhero movie yes. Art-house film maybe.<br />
<br />
Recently we discovered ticket prices do not seem to matter. We went to the theatre, yes, with an 'tre', live actors and dancers, it was a musical, and the cell phone addiction was a problem there too. The young lady who sat next to us, apparently mistook this Broadway Theatre for her living room. She insisted on sitting with her shoeless feet on her seat or draped over the empty seat in front of her. Okay, whatever, youth. But then, through-out the first act she kept checking her cell phone and messaging. Even with low light it was annoying. On top of her other annoying antics. I should say we paid over $120 each for our tickets, the cheapest seats go for about $89.<br />
<br />
Netflix and Amazon Prime are my sources of movie entertainment, because in my own home, we'll stop the movie if you need to talk on the cell phone. Or use the bathroom. The popcorn is cheap and the seats are comfy. The water is even cheaper. I love the people, okay person, I am with and his annoying habits don't make me want him dead.<br />
<br />Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-22998693534870252512015-08-04T13:36:00.000-04:002015-08-04T13:36:41.072-04:00Oh, that's tempting, but noWe're looking around for daycare.<br />
We have no children or even one kid yet. We are not pregnant.<br />
We are in the process of adoption.<br />
Just the process.<br />
But we were advised to get that daycare thing lined up.<br />
So many people have been helpful providing names of places that I or the Help should check out. One was a Catholic school with real live nuns that does infant care. They don't have the day care prices on line but the school tuition looks... if we had a school aged kid I'd totally put him or her in this school without batting an eye... provided the kid couldn't get into a neighborhood charter.<br />
There are discounts for having more than 1 kid at the school and there is a discount for being Catholic, as there should be.<br />
To get the Catholic discount, and it is a good discount, you have to have a letter from your priest. Easy peasy. Be a member of a parish, financially supporting the parish. Also, easy peasy. And most importantly, the kid must be baptized and Catholic. Nope.<br />
With me being Catholic and the spouse being protestant, we have come to an agreement. Kids will be raised as really bad Baptists, until it is decided where the kid flourishes best. As we told our social worker, the child's relationship with Jesus is primary and they will go to the church where that relationship is best. Also I don't want any little lapsed Catholics as children. I also don't want little atheists or agnostics, either. So the poor little dears will have to go to church 2xs a week until I decide where they are best suited.<br />
So it would be really tempting to baptize a baby for the Catholic discount, but I will resist. <br />
<br />Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-71081016138094283632015-07-12T21:13:00.001-04:002015-07-12T21:13:59.757-04:00Several in OneI've been meaning to post on a couple of topics but then something new happens. So I'm going to post them all at once.<br />
<br />
<h4>
At the cross</h4>
This hymn has been inside my head all day.<br />
All weekend I've been bugged by a run in I had with a prostitute. Ho's Hobos and Joggers should stay out of the bike lane. It's a bike lane. Anyway I had rung my bell and she cursed at me saying I should move. It had been in my head to get her type back, but I experienced a small miracle and my husband's words (quoting the Bible) "Do not repay evil with evil" reminded me that I really should just let it go. But it is hard. I've decided the better come back is "Jesus loves you."<br />
What does this have to do with the hymn in my head? Something to sing on my way to work as I pass the ladies serving the breakfast Johns. Otherwise nothing.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Catholic Deaconess- I'll take it </h4>
I really don't think there is such an animal. Deacons are men and preferably ones who want to be priests. And in my husband's church, which also is a bit patriarchal, there are no deaconess. Well none since the split with the PCUSA.<br />
The last week's mass was another where B & J did not show up, nor did K. Worse Fr. W. was on vacay or somewhere else, so Fr. L whose church is kinda crashing at ours, celebrated mass. Fr. L still hasn't gotten the rhythm of the Saturday quickie mass. He's got the short homily down but there were some parts (the creed) that got skipped. Now why is it important that B&J show up. J does the readings. I also do readings but I have been doing more of the readings since people aren't showing up due to Summer. And B & J take the offering, and know when to take the offering. And J also helps with the distribution of the host. J does a lot. If B&J aren't there Fr. W pretty much knows who to pull in to assist with the mass. Fr. L, and to be very fair any other substitute priest, would not. So I took charge (I did not want to) read the readings, got the hubby (who was in attendance with me) to help me with collecting the offering.<br />
After the mass there was a regular & possible neighborhood character floating around begging for help. I have seen her interacting with Fr. W before and know she uses the church to get food. There is a food pantry somewhere in the church but I don't know much about it. Fr. L was unsure what to do or how to handle it as the people who normally deal with this matter were all unreachable. So I jumped in ans helped. I told her I'd run to the Giant on the next block and buy her 3 things, after a too long exchange of what she couldn't eat (high blood pressure, diabetes, really bad teeth) which seemed to be anything healthy (no salad, no green beans). She asked me if I was the deaconess. No, but I'll take that title to get this over with. The three things were hamburger meat, cheddar cheese and a roll of toilet tissue. You know what is near impossible to find in the store on the 4th of July in the evening? Hamburger meat. But I found it and lucky me the last few packages were for grass fed organic cows. $12 later, plus the .05 cent bag fee, she got her 3 items.<br />
<br />
<h4>
You can't say I left the Episcopalians to get away from the gay</h4>
I am very happy that B. brings his non-Catholic partner C to mass and they are regular attendees. Same for A. who has been bringing, or has been brought by due to his illness, his non-Catholic partner (with the rings I suspect 'spouse') J. I love all these men, Catholic and non-Catholic and enjoy their presence. I also love that the diocese had a l<a href="http://www.adw.org/2015/06/26/statement-of-the-archdiocese-of-washington-on-the-decision-of-the-supreme-court-of-the-united-state-regarding-same-sex-marriage/" target="_blank">etter for everyone</a>, that the church inserted into the bulletin clarifying its stance regarding marriage.<br />
I was chatting with a friend at the Help's church about the continuing downward spiral of the Episcopal Church. But he summed up my feelings well saying, "Not your circus, not your problem." So with that I'm going to stop giving to all Episcopal and Anglican (even those who separated) because that's no longer my problem. There are other denominations going to Hell in a handbasket as well as they follow Mammon and the god of the zietgiest, but they are not my problem.<br />
I am trusting the Holy Roman Catholic Church with my soul and pray that it will stay faithful to the teachings of Our Savior. I trust her to help guide me in my relations with my gay brothers and sisters in Christ as they seek G-d in a church that respects life, doesn't water down the gospel, and is universal with a place for the left and the right. <br />
Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-54269899149589732572015-05-21T11:45:00.002-04:002015-05-21T11:45:56.949-04:00#Rednoseday #joykillSomewhere in the Bible it says to give without over thinking it.<br />
Screw it, I overthink it, but we give.<br />
A co-worker alerted me that it is Red Nose Day. Now, I remember Red Nose Day from my time in the UK and because I love British Television. So I am aware of it. Not so much aware of how useful it is.<br />
Red Nose Day has jumped the pond and is over here in the Land of the Free & Home of the Brave<span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"></span>.<br />
It would help if I actually watched more television but the gist I get is that they are raising money for childhood poverty with promises that lives will be changed. I looked at the website for more information. They are vague on the desired outcomes, well besides wearing red noses and raising money. Not too much on the dull stuff regarding how the money will be used. Couldn't find jack on which organizations will get any of the money raised.<br />
And now my critical thinking skills kick in.<br />
This is bull.<br />
There is something in a charity you know, and you know what they do and you see their work on the ground. There is also something in knowing charities you wouldn't touch with a 10 foot pole because they are ineffective, have bad leadership, engage in things you despise, or something else that doesn't sit well with you. So I wouldn't be quick to support something where I can't see who is doing the heavy lifting and if any heavy lifting is being done and if it is just not a feel good exercise. Maybe there is a list of charities that are being supported by Red Nose Day but it's too buried in the site for my taste if it is there.<br />
<br />
Want to feed people?<br />
a. Find people who need food and feed them<br />
b. Find who feeds the people in your community and give them money.<br />
<br />
Want to help kids get out of poverty?<br />
1. Figure out what gets kids out of poverty<br />
a. practice it in your own community<br />
b. give to organizations that do that thing or set of things that gets kids out of poverty<br />
2. Learn about people who used to be poor children and aren't poor anymore. Tell people what you've learned.<br />
<br />
Education is one of the things that helps get people out of poverty. Good education that provides marketable skills. But it is just one of several parts of a ladder needed to help, assist, people out of poverty.<br />
<br />
But it is easier to have a party and focus on the spectacle than the hard work. Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-5434711082549012792015-05-01T08:55:00.001-04:002015-05-01T08:55:46.629-04:00Practice, Practice, Practice<span style="font-size: large;">My thoughts are on training. At the place where they pay me, we have lots (I consider lots) of training. Thankfully, most of it is on-line. We also get memos of policy, some of those are written in a form of English that I understand. I have a graduate degree. I have two graduate degrees, I should be able to understand a stupid policy statement. But alas, jargon, inside knowledge of what a vaguely named department that is 2 weeks old, and pretzel logic makes it difficult.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">What does this have to do with faith, Christianity and such? Practice. Our household is of practicing Christians. Not just believing Christians. We pray, not as much as we should, but it is a daily practice. The Help reads the Bible to me nightly, not every night (esp. if we're really sleepy), but most nights before bed he reads a chapter to me. We're on Philippians. We go to church once a week, sometimes twice, not always the same church. As a Catholic, when we travel, we sure as heck attend mass. But unlike that practice which kinda sorta lines up with the happy thoughts in our head, the missives and training at work don't always line up with the practice.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The biggest problem is security, but it would be not in my best interest to talk about that in detail. Let's say policy and practice don't really line up.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">There is training. That is not always practiced. We are told a certain system is to do X and certain personnel respond to it as so. But in the day to day, it does not live up to that.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">There is trust. Or the lack thereof. Despite the memos and other communication, a certain practice says daily, "we don't trust you." There is no daily/weekly practice here of 'we need you to help us preserve this', 'we need you to help people find things', or 'we need to work together for a true common goal.'</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Some training, not all, is forgotten after it is done, because it doesn't relate to the culture of the place. There is the training, and there is the way you really do it. The practice of it. </span>Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9912445.post-9801767688082522062014-12-08T22:59:00.002-05:002014-12-08T22:59:52.311-05:00This Catholicism thing can be a PITAToday is the celebration of the Immaculate Conception, or a day when I have to drag my butt to church and it is not a weekend day, a day of obligation.<br />
Yes, I pondered forgetting about it and just confessing missing it later, but when I remembered it (a better person would have put the day in her calendar with an alarm) I had a good 20 minutes to hoof it over to the nearest Catholic church during my lunch hour. An hoof it I did, and when I showed up there was almost nothing but standing room, but after some looking around I managed to squeeze in a pew that had as much leg room as a cheap flight to Florida.<br />
Nothing too hard about it, except my own church as spoiled me with the '30 minutes or your next mass is free' speed. To get a mass to be short it helps to cut out all the singing. The signing did not help because some churches have different music they sing parts of the mass to and since it has been years since I've regularly attended a singing mass, I have no clue. I know the words but the music throws me for a loop. I know I wasn't the only one because I heard a bit of confusion during the bits we the congregation say/sing. It didn't help that the acoustics at times made the speaker sound as clear as announcement on the metro.<br />
I fulfilled my obligation. Rushing back I was thinking, my schedule was way simpler when I was an Episcopal. But but then again, maybe I was tired. I went to mass on Saturday and then lesson and carols on Sunday....
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/2QrAVtn6ZzA" width="560"></iframe>Marihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12378722789147387229noreply@blogger.com0